i just woke up from the strangest dream. i was living in this old apartment complex with a rectangular pool, and i had ming-na wen's voice but i looked exactly like my half-sister (read: trashy asian). i had just discovered in the pool that the entire ocean floor was just a sealed spongey cover for a world underneath, and the bottom of the pool also had these spongey openings on the side. i knew it was a secret pathway to the world underneath! and i was swimming in the pool alone when i realized this and as soon as i started to rush out, the pool started quaking and trying to suck me in. but i was too deft. i ran out to warn my family about my findings when upon returning home, i saw my little sister, who was lilo from lilo and stitch, covered with these festering black scabs. and i knew she had been in the pool and to the other world and now was dying of infection! i fretted but nobody would get her help and nobody would believe what i found out about the ocean netherworld and my brother-in-law was peter gallagher and he kept saying, slightly off-topic: "At least I can get a job and provide for all of us. Thank God I got a Ph.D. in Postal Services!" then just as i was about to put on aqua eyeshadow, i noticed black scabs sprouting on my arm and i screamed and woke up.

i can only hope the aqua eyeshadow was a disguise for slinking by the pool monster to look for a cure.

even in my dream i was thinking, 'there must be a movie like this already!'